A Restless Heart

You do okay. You wake up and get through your daily tasks as a parent, spouse, or coworker....calling out spelling words, submitting a new proposal, or cooking a healthy dinner. You try to take time for yourself. But, you find your heart restless. This world and those in your life aren't meeting your expectations and neither is God. You want more out of life, but you aren't sure what that is. What happened to "take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart?" Lessons in Trust As a divorced mom of two, who has unfortunately experienced first-hand how addiction can destroy families, I knew God was asking me to trust Him. My strong Catholic upbringing and experiences of God had allowed me to do this in the past, but this time was different. It is hard to understand and to trust when you have wept too much to see the road in front of you. You are paralyzed in despair and fear, so you do the only thing you can—lift your eyes to Heaven, to our Father who is all-knowing and all-loving. You wonder how this could happen to you; you've done everything "right" in your life. If His yoke is easy, why is life so hard? It is in these moments that you just have to let yourself be held by the Creator of the Universe, the God of Wonders…with a touch so strong but so tender, and a love so vast but so personal. Great God, be small enough to hear us, and speak to the quiet of our hearts. Embrace the Ache As life goes on, I strive to have a grateful heart each day, thanking God for my many blessings, such as my two beautiful little ladies, my wonderful supportive family, and our good health. We all have much to be thankful for. But I find myself constantly seeking out God—yearning for something more—by spending countless time at mass and in the chapel, asking God to reveal His will to me, to enlighten me, to enhance my capacity to love, and to give me strength to be my best self. During these times, when I feel His love pour over me and his Spirit envelop me, I know how greatly He loves each of us, and that the offerings of this world will never be enough. It is there I am wanted, pursued, deeply cared for, and safe in His arms. And it is there that He has revealed to me my innermost longing—a desire from the depths of my heart—to go home. I'm homesick for heaven! A Holy Foundation My experiences, both blessings and those in disguise, have shown me where my foundation must lie. To truly trust God, you must relinquish control, and that is when your true beauty is revealed and your soul fills with inner peace. You realize that suffering is a gift. You realize that you are chosen. It is an honor to carry that cross, as it is only when our hearts are pierced like His Sacred Heart that they can be transformed. The cross always leads to glory, and we should strive for holiness because it is attainable. With fresh eyes, we can certainly find extraordinary things in our ordinary lives. Finding Home in This World Like my all-time favorite song by Michael W. Smith, we all search to find our "Place in This World." You doubt yourself sometimes. Are you good enough—a good enough mom, a good enough daughter, a good enough friend? But have you thought to envision yourself through God's eyes? You are made perfect in His perfect gaze. As we long for the hope of heaven, waiting deepens and matures our faith and allows time and space to broaden our understanding. God invites us to dream dreams, and He knows the desires of our hearts. Life can be full. It can be all you dreamed it to be. If you'll only take his Hand, He will help you take a step towards the best version of yourself. So, my friends, rest your restless heart in Him. Surrender your kingdoms at His feet. Be empowered in your faith, and look for the ways hope is fulfilled each day. Open your eyes to the abounding miracles before you. You just might find all the more reason to hope. After all, nothing can compare to the joy that's coming. And each day is one day closer to Him.